What does one do at a time like this? Surround yourself with friends and vicodine, of course! Party on the lawn! What's that you say? it still hurts? Well then, add some whiskey! Brilliant!
Here comes Kyle up the fish hatchery! See Kyle. See Kyle Run. Run Kyle Run! Our boy made a smashing play for the finish again this year, but he and a group of about 10 guys found themselves off course at one point and thus, missed the cut-off and were disqualified.

But Kyle, what is that you are carrying? The Marmot Kompressor? Yes it is...the latest in fall fashion, the Kompressor is once again hot on the scene with its lightweight, minimal design and easy functionality...perfect for a hydration pack, small personal items, or an upgraded compression sack for your sleeping bag. Kyle, you stylish devil!

Alas, it will once again be "next year" that is course is conquered and both heros return to Iowa victorious. As for now, this is Vanessa Hohn, signing off and wishing you all champaign wishes and caviar dreams!